Interaction and connection
Repair
Mend it after a misunderstanding, an offence, or a loss of connection.
The gapIgnoring the breakdown, or defending yourself instead of repairing it.
When to use it
After a conversation you know went wrong.
What you need
A partner to recreate the moment.
The steps
- Recreate the breakdown.
- Stop where the connection was damaged.
- Identify what happened.
- Acknowledge the problem specifically.
- Leave out the justification.
- Clarify what you had intended.
- Check their experience of it.
- Re establish the conversation.
- Return to the original objective only once the connection is back.
You know it worked when
You can acknowledge and repair without defending.
What else it works, and why
- Intent
- The conversation has to be reconnected to what it was for.
- Message
- The breakdown usually needs clarification or correction.
- Delivery
- Repair often needs a different tone.
- Presence
- You have to tolerate the discomfort and stay composed.
What usually goes wrong
Sorry if you felt, instead of naming the thing you actually did.
Which drill is yours, in what order and at what dose, is not something a page can tell you. That is what a Discovery Call is for.
Take the AssessmentOr read the whole glossary first.